VAMPIRE SIGHTING!

After many miserable days in which it seemed like we lived in Hoth System, we have finally returned to beautiful, beautiful weather!!!! With that being said, for all of you losers sitting inside, GET YOUR BUTTS OUTDOORS! I don't know if you've noticed, but the weather around here is kinda shifty soooo, get outside and get some fresh air.  It'll definitely do you some good.  And to all of you people with your leather backpacks and bags, have no fear, I will be joining you shortly, but until that time I am thoroughly jealous of your coolness.  You will be inferior once I bring back out my Florentine leather messenger bag.  Can't beat Florentine leather suckerssssss.  I must question the sanity of some of people sitting outside of Clemons though.  I am in a turquoise romper (thats right, laugh.  it looks hott on me, you're just jealous) and I had to take off my sweater because I was sweating.  Here's my crazy, but extraordinarily logical explanation (at least for me) as to why you are sitting like that.  You are obviously a vampire.  Look dude, embrace who are you.  Take that scarf off and let your body sparkleeeee! It's really ok.  Honestly, I don't even really think people will notice.  Vampires are kinda last year.  So seriously, just embrace your vampireness...although on second thought I would appreciate it if you refrained from embracing all aspects of your vampireness...you know like the part about sucking humans blood.  Embrace your body, just not all of your cravings.  Self-restraint is a good thing.  Thanks.

P.S. Who else thinks Water for Elephants looks FANTASTIC!?!  Cant wait!

Movie post or inspirational quote post next?  You know that it won't necessarily be what you think either way.  Opinions/thoughts/suggestions/love and admiration?  All of the above is appreciated.

GO OUTSIDE AND HAVE FUN! Be a five year old and run around on the lawn.  Play tag.  Play ladder ball and drink a beer (ok maybe five years don't do that.  lame asses.) Wear a sundress.  LET YOUR LEGS BE FREE! Aka, go and have fun and enjoy this weather while it lasts before it turns back into the Hoth System

I blame this on you Alfred the Great

As usual I am updating my blog because I have deemed it a worthy enterprise than doing required reading for a class. In my defense, I have actually read this book twice before so I mean, technically, I've done the reading. Anyways, I am once again in the library. I know. Bet you werent expecting that! Ha. Anyways, I began to realize a series of emotions that I really shouldn't have in reference to a particular object. I go from longing, to excitement, to anxiety, to fear, and then utter joy, a sense of euphoria if you please, in a short range of time. Seriously, I am may explode from the flood of emotions that come from this experience. Oh and anger is sometimes the dominant emotion at the end. It truly is a heaven or hell situation. Anyways, have you figured it out yet? The one object that demands more of my emotions than most alcohol induced night?














It's the god damn vending machine!

But really, whoever created the vending machine has a sick sense of humor. You were the kid that got the crap beaten out of you on the playground weren't you? You made it so the big dudes couldn't get the small piece of candy out of the machine. You made it so that they would have to attack the inanimate object, yell, and scream, and cry and pound just to get a small, sweet, and savory treat out of it. Well, let me tell you. The joke is over. I did not beat you up on the playground and normally I would have defended you but now? Ohhh now, you have officially been entered into my eternal damnation list. You and your machine. And I will crusade against your unjust actions. This is war. A war for justice, peace, and eternal happiness free from the repression of an inanimate object who's inadequacy attempt to destroy my happiness. Well I will stand for it no longer. This is war vending machine. And I will win. Be afraid. Be very afraid vending machine.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

How Unfortunate

So, instead of reading Perez.com for my Art and Anthropology I was creepily checking out guys in the library as per usual.  Lets be honest, the people are around me are far more interesting than Pomo basket weaving and seriously, isn't anthropology all about observation and being part of the human community.  Kinda hard to do that when I'm reading a book.  Anyways, under that bull shit pretense I spotted two very adorable first, maybe second, year boys.  Mr Cocoa-colored hair was very interesting to watch until he did something absolutely horrific to my day dreaming as to who he was.  He stretched.  Now normally, this would not bother me in the least, but this stretch was just not normal.  Actually, it was terrifying.  While stretching, he emitted the loudest, most barbaric (yes, I went there anthro nerds) sound.  I felt a chill down my spine and instead of immediately hiding underneath my desk which was my first reaction, I decided to get a better look.  The next sound that came out of him may perhaps have been a yawn for some but for me it sounded like a Wookie crying at the take-over of their planet, like at the end of Episode III.  Now, normally this would have made me sympathize with him but this kid is not a wookie.  He's not even hairy.  Now, all I can think of when I look at him is that he needs to be giant and hairy (a walking carpet comes to mind) and to be honest, the amount of hair that I'm talking about it just not attractive.  So I ceased my stalking of former beauty #1 and continued onto to potential daydream man #2.  At first I thought he was an engineer, staring intently at his computer screen and then, of course, I had to see what he was working on because, let's be honest, it has to be more interesting than reading about Pomo basket weaving.  Anything should be more interesting than Pomo basket weaving.  Well, not that this isn't interesting but seriously, Dungeons and Dragons?  Dude, that was so 90s.  Pick up on what's cool nerd stuff.  So disappointed.  Congrats unfortunate specimens of the male sex, you have officially deterred me from creepily looking at people in the library.  Pomo basket weaving will be far less disappointing than you.  You should be ashamed. (note sarcasm...but not really)

Febreeze please?

Alright, its the week before spring break and I've basically been stuck in the library with everyone else who seems to have a shit ton of crap to do this week.  I have 3 exams in 24 hours.  So, as per usual, I will ace one while failing the other two.  Props to me.  Anyways, I would like to comment on few things that should be known as basic etiquette in the library.

1) This is a library.  You know, where books are housed and people study.  I mean, yeah, there are tables in there, but these tables are not your dining room table and you're not at a restaurant.  You have some serious issues if you order an entire Chinese feast and sit at a table in Clemons Library eating it with three of your friends and then, once the meal is over, you all get up and leave.  No like really, you don't have tables or common rooms you could go eat?  Don't get me wrong, I love me some Chinese food, but only when I'm eating it because let's be honest, it actually smells disgusting.  So to you person who just ordered and opened some awful smelling Chinese food and have now proceeded to let it fall over your shirt, its 9:00 PM, it is not meal time nor is it appropriate snack time for Chinese food.  The only thing I want to smelling right now are books and my wonderful Ralph Lauren Romance perfume.  My recently shampooed hair is in front of my hair at this very moment in order that I might smell the lusciousness that is my hair instead of your smelly food.  I would rather look like Cousin It then smell your food.  You should be ashamed.

2) If you've ever been in Clemons Library, then you know that the fourth floor has booths off to one side next to the huge windows.  Now, there are not a lot of these booths and are thus a scarce, precious, and therefore rare commodity and must therefore be treated with great respect.  So you can imagine my disdain at seeing a booth with books and backpack in it, but no person...for over an hour and a half.  I understand saving your seat but thats just plain evil.  Way to be a colonial oppressor.  I, a native of the library, wish to obtain a seat that as a fourth year should rightfully be mine, but you have taken that opportunity away from me.  Nor do I appreciate the kid that sits on the table of one of these booths laughing and giggling with his friends while no one is sitting there.  It's seriously like you're mocking me.  It's just not ok.  I am sitting here, in my little spot near the booths, looking longingly over at your basically empty booth while you seat on its table laughing and joking around.  Kid, you are cruisin for a bruisin,  Not.cool.

3) Just saw a girl with a pillow leave and come back with a blanket in tow.  oh.shit.

New business idea: rent air mattresses, pillows, and blankets to the lifeless souls pulling all-nighters in Clemons.  Genius.  You all would be in such a zombie-like state that you would have no idea what you were paying for.  MWAHAHAHAHA.

I will be here all.night.long.



shit.

The Anti-Climatic Update

Yooo whats up internet world.  Alright so this blog post is not the epic awesome blog post that I had previously promised.  Eventually that blog post will go up, but for right now I will just have to disappoint you and update you on my life which has taken a pretty crazy turn.  Ok, so a lot of you knew that I was intending on continuing my education immediately after college.  Well, I have officially changed my mind and decided to take a stab at the real world and get a real job.  God help America.  Anyways, it seriously feels like a giant weight has just been lifted off of my shoulders so I know that I've made the right decision. Awesomeness.

Ok here's a little taste of what my epic, semi-serious blog post will be about.  For the past few years I've been reading online newspapers like nytimes.com, cnn.com, washingtonpost.com, huffington post...you get the picture and I realized that no matter what else was going on in the world, I always made it a point to read about anything that had to do with the American education system.  When I realized this, I justified my constantly going immediately to these articles because I am currently in the American education system and therefore seem much more immediate and real to me than articles complaining about Obama or the economy or basically anything that had to do with real life (note that my most frequented website after my e-mail and facebook is Perez.com so you can just see how I view my reality).  I also realized that I was getting furious with a lot of the articles concerning education in American colleges and universities, but mostly because they're making this assumption that because we don't seem to be testing well, we are therefore idiots.  I keep on reading articles talking about how our generation knows less than previous generations, that we have no sense of community, that we've lost touch with the real world, that we have all of these anxiety and psychological issues which is caused by our bullying nature and high competition.  Everything I keep on reading in these articles makes us seem like we're a self-destructive generation that has no hope of turning America around.  Yet, I can't help but be infuriated by what is being written because we're being judged by people outside of our generation who are basing their analysis on specific and fantastic events.  We're being judged by people who have not gone through what we have.  I've read a few articles claiming that we don't have the same "American" spirit as before.  Well let me tell you something.  No shit we're different than previous generations. We didn't grow up in the same world as our parents or grandparents.  We have a war that the majority of us don't understand nor support but this isn't our Vietnam.  We have a recession but this isn't our Great Depression.  Basically, what I'm gonna do in the blog post that I keep on promising is attempt to understand what it means to be in our generation and I guess my whole point is that we, as a generation, need to stop being ok with the fact that these "outsiders" are attempting to define us.  They're attempting to give us an identity which does not in fact depict us at all.  Maybe its time that we start depicting what it really means to be a part of our generation so we can stop having people define it for us.  If you do not want to read anything that has to do with that, then I recommend that you be cautious about reading my next few blog posts.  Thanks for being patient with me as I try to grasp who we are.

"Not all those who wander are lost." - J.R.R. Tolkein

Big Update Coming Soon

I haven't forgotten about the blog. I'm working on a post that is a little different from what I normally write on, so please deal with me because my brain is a little preoccupied at the moment with how to word my big blog post. But in other news, I body-painted myself in blue and had a handprint on my face Braveheart style and ran around in the freezing cold last night in a sports bra, body paint, and workout pants. No I have no rational for it and under normal circumstances, if I were on the other side looking at the scene we made last night, I would have been seriously disturbed and probably would have written about how stupid those people were. But the reality is that the fact that is was insane is what made it so much fun. Sometimes the release from the everyday is just what you need. Over and out.

oh no you didn'tttt

OH NO YOU DID NOT JUST HEAD BUTT THE BACK OF MY HEAD BECAUSE YOUR HEAD-BANGING!!!! An apology is in order, like now. Oh and freak, when you just sneezed, you actually ended up flinging your back so hard into the booth that you knocked me forward and I hit my elbow on the table in front of me. You are not on my good list, sir.

Also, congratulations to the new SDT pledge class!!! And for all of you lazy butts reading this. STOP READING AND GO OUTSIDE! ITS BEAUTIFUL!!! That is all. Go eat chocolate shaped like hearts.

Oh and kid, you put your hand up near my face again, I might just high-five it just to freak you out.