Thursday, March 31, 2011

I blame this on you Alfred the Great

As usual I am updating my blog because I have deemed it a worthy enterprise than doing required reading for a class. In my defense, I have actually read this book twice before so I mean, technically, I've done the reading. Anyways, I am once again in the library. I know. Bet you werent expecting that! Ha. Anyways, I began to realize a series of emotions that I really shouldn't have in reference to a particular object. I go from longing, to excitement, to anxiety, to fear, and then utter joy, a sense of euphoria if you please, in a short range of time. Seriously, I am may explode from the flood of emotions that come from this experience. Oh and anger is sometimes the dominant emotion at the end. It truly is a heaven or hell situation. Anyways, have you figured it out yet? The one object that demands more of my emotions than most alcohol induced night?

It's the god damn vending machine!

But really, whoever created the vending machine has a sick sense of humor. You were the kid that got the crap beaten out of you on the playground weren't you? You made it so the big dudes couldn't get the small piece of candy out of the machine. You made it so that they would have to attack the inanimate object, yell, and scream, and cry and pound just to get a small, sweet, and savory treat out of it. Well, let me tell you. The joke is over. I did not beat you up on the playground and normally I would have defended you but now? Ohhh now, you have officially been entered into my eternal damnation list. You and your machine. And I will crusade against your unjust actions. This is war. A war for justice, peace, and eternal happiness free from the repression of an inanimate object who's inadequacy attempt to destroy my happiness. Well I will stand for it no longer. This is war vending machine. And I will win. Be afraid. Be very afraid vending machine.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

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