Sir Court House, Defender of Seats

I'm reading the newspaper on the metro when all of a sudden I feel a soft warm feeling against my left arm. Comforting at first I ignored it until that originally soothing warmth becomes irritatingly hot and starts to make my left arm sweat but my right arm is freezing. Like seriously WTF is that heat coming from? Oh. The guy sitting next to me. Who is now asleep. Who is my size and weight but has somehow managed to take over not only his seat but mine as well. Now I am literally pushed up against the window because he has taken over my seat. I've tried everything to regain my territory. I glared. I made loads of throat clearing noises. I did a quick strike to his right arm. I awkwardly put my left arm all over his right one. I kicked his foot. I've tried everything. This man is determined and my stop is coming up so I am now sitting in a third of my seat, up against the window. Rosslyn you cannot come fast enough. Half of my body is burning and half is freezing. Also a guy behind me saw me and offered to help me. Sir, you are amazing. You are my knight of the metro. I knight thee Sir Court House, Defender of Seats.

Oh and to the guy sitting behind me next to Sir Court House, Defender of Seats. I saw you taking a picture of my hair. Did not appreciate you sticking your phone in the back of my head. Although turning around and seeing you freak out because I caught you made my metro ride. So thank you hair fetish paparazzi guy. You made my day.

All Magic Comes With A Price

Less than a week until Once Upon A Time returns to ABC!  I absolutely cannot wait!  All of the teasers that the producers have been releasing over the past few weeks have been driving me CRAZY!!!  So for all of you OUAT fans out there, check out another great sneak peek from TV Guide.  In this article you get 4 clips from the next season and, I'm gonna take a wild guess here, but they seem to be from the first episode which is RIDICULOUSLY EXCITING!  So without further ado here is my unnecessary analysis of the 4 clips and what they could possible mean for the rest of Season 2.

Dr Whale Getting Feisty- www.aceshowbiz.com

Clip 1: It seems as if Regina has lost her powers, but as you learn in another clip (clip #3) that magic does not work the same in Storybrooke as it did in the fairy-tale land.  Well no shit, we figured that out too.  With that said though, I still believe that Regina's enactment of the curse may have had an even larger price than she had anticipated.  It may have seriously diminished her powers.  Thats a little far-fetched but it could possibly be part of the problem.  The most interesting part of this clip however is the interaction between Regina and Dr Whale.  Was Dr Whale Team Regina in fairy-tale land or a victim of Regina's.  Is he mad because Regina betrayed him somehow or is he mad because he remembers the awful things that Regina did to him?  I don't know because I honestly am having the hardest time figuring out his character.  Was he one of Regina's guards?  He seems too important to be someone that insignificant but now I'm not so sure.  I just can't think of any fairy-tale characters that are doctors or medical staff in any way shape or form.  I still hold that he might be part of Pinocchio's story but my belief in that theory is fading fast.

Clip 2: Snow White/Mary Margaret/Mrs Charming/Emma's mom/Henry's grandmother, Prince Charming/David/Shepard/Emma's father/Abigail's husband/Snow White's husband/Henry's grandfather, and Emma are walking down the street with the "good guys" of Storybrooke and basically Mr and Mrs Charming want to speak with their daughter about everything thats going on and Emma expectedly is like, um hell to tha nah.  I mean when you think about, how effed up is that?  If you're an orphan and all you dream about is finding your parents, I think that its pretty normal to assume that your parents are going to be, oh I don't know, OLDER THAN YOU?  Yeah, thats just effed up.  Totally understand Emma's concern in this issue.  Totally messed up.

Clip 3: Regina's in jail and can't use magic.  She tells Prince Charming that the land that they left is gone, that is has been destroyed.  Somehow I have a hard time believing that because where would the magic have come from.  Where would Jefferson have gone to get the apple if it wasn't from their land?  Also, I don't ever remember Rumpelstiltskin saying that the curse would destroy fairy-tale land, only that it would transport them to a place where they would not achieve their happy endings.  Also, Regina makes this claim because Prince Charming seems to think that by breaking the curse, they would somehow be transported back.  Last time I checked they never stated what breaking the curse meant exactly.  If they want their happy endings, then finding each other with their memories in tact would be breaking the curse, not transporting them back.  Also, they've already mentioned that magic does not work the same in Storybrooke.  Does that also mean that even though the "curse is broken," it could have originally meant that they would be transported back but because magic doesn't work the same, they weren't?  Also, I'm not sure if the curse has been broken.  Isn't Emma supposed to fight Regina a bunch of times?  Pretty positive that came into play in one of the episodes that she is actually supposed to fight Regina a few times.  Last time I checked, Emma has definitely not attacked Regina enough times to make that happen.

Colin O'Donoghue as OUAT's Captain Hook- msnbc.com

Clip 4: Belle and Rumpelstiltskin.  Enough said.  That relationship is gonna be weird.  The end.

Can't wait for the addition of Captain Hook!!! Thats going to be FANTASTIC!!!!

Magic Is Back!

The hit ABC show Once Upon a Time (sometimes known as Once to fans) finished Season 1 in May with a bang!  MAGIC IS BACK AND STORYBROOKE, MAINE IS THE PLACE TO BE!!!!  Once comes back to us on September 30th and I gotta say that it can't come fast enough.  I've been obsessively reading about all of the new characters that will be added this season, who will be playing them, and most importantly, what the return of magic means to the characters.  I won't go too much into it right now but I have quite a few theories, but right now my big question for everyone is: Who is Dr. Whale?  What is his character???  Its been driving me CRAZY!!!!  I think he's a character from Pinocchio but a part of me thinks that that is too simple.  Plus, he didn't recognize August/Pinocchio.  Also, do you think Sheriff Graham/the Huntsman will be making a come back???  I seriously hope so, but howwww?!?  I mean his heart is technically gone so will he be a zombie?  I didn't think that magic could bring people back from the dead...things to ponder.

I'm not entirely sure who made this poster, but it is giving me hope.  I'm just hoping that it won't turn out to be false and devastate my heart.  Ha.  Ha.  I'm so sorry for the puns.  I really hate puns and this is seriously not being done on purpose.

Check out these photos of Season 2 from TV Guide!!!  Dr. Whale seems to be having a pretty heated conversation with Prince Charming/David/Emma's dad/Katherine's husband/Snow White's husband/Henry's grandfather.  The highlighted could potentially get ugly.  Or awkward.  Or both.  Unless Frederick magically appears.  Ha ha.  Even though David/Prince James/Shepard left Katherine/Abigail I don't think they were divorced.  Does that even matter?  It might?  We know Frederick exists in Storybrooke but lets be honest, its still kind of awkward seeing as they will now have memories of both lives and will have to reconcile them.  Also, rumor has it (ooooo rumor has it ooooo- Adele :) ) that apparently at one point Snow White/Mary Margaret and Emma are somehow out of the picture?  Are they hiding in the woods?  WHAT IS GOING ON?!?

Anyways, I'll hopefully be updating more on other tidbits that I've found during the offseason to get people excited for the new season.  Enjoy and let me know what you think!

Book Review: Wolf Hall

I just finished reading Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel and I've gotta say that Im giving it 4 1/2 to 5 stars. Here's my review:

I've gotta say that I absolutely loved this book.  For the first 80 pages or so, I truly wasn't impressed and I almost stopped reading.  I had a really hard time understanding the voice that Hlary Mantel was using.  Even though I become engrossed with the book and I loved the plot and the characterization, I can't truly say that I ever became wholly comfortable with the voice that she was using.  I had to keep reminding myself that "he" at all time means Cromwell, a nice usage considering one of the major historical points in this novel is the "Reformation" of England under Henry VIII. I liked that touch.  I'm not entirely sure if that's why she did it, but I'm going to pretend that's why.  I almost gave it 4 stars just because the beginning was so difficult to read and there was a nonexistent flow of the plot, but I ended up giving it 5 stars because once I had figured out the voice and I accepted how unusual and at times confusing it was, I was obsessed with the characterization of Thomas Cromwell.  I enjoyed how she broke up the chapters of the books into smaller sections that made you want to keep going.  Just one more little section...just one more little section....just one more little section....and then all of the sudden you check the clock and you've been reading for three hours.  In other words, get through the first 80 pages and I doubt that youll be disappointed.  Happy reading!

Major Crimes Major Disappointment

!!!!!SPOILERS ALERT!!!!!

Just finished watching the first episode of TNTs new drama, Major Crimes, a spin-off from the highly successful and critically acclaimed drama The Closer which ended last Monday, August 13.  During the last six episodes of The Closer, TNT prepared its audience for the coming of Major Crimes by laying the foundations for the majority of the characters' backgrounds.  It also seemed as if the show was purposefully making the parting from the wonderful Brenda Leigh Johnson less painful by making it seem as if she was starting to loose a grip on what her real function as the Chief of Major Crimes was.  TNT also attempted to warm the audience up to Mary McDonnell's character, Captain Rayder.  During the last few episodes of The Closer, I gotta say that I was starting to root for Rayder.  You actually became upset (and not because of Rayder's seemingly huge, horrific hairstyle) because Brenda didn't seem to really be giving Rayder a chance and it seemed as if Rayder was really trying to help Brenda out.  It seemed as if she really agreed with what Brenda was doing and understood and wanted to continue her work.  Well, let me just tell you all something people.  SHENANIGANS.  The entire plot of the first episode of Major Crimes was basically to undo everything that Brenda had done which, in my opinion, is actually kind of a dick thing to do.  I also don't understand why they had to have Rayder take over as the head of Major Crimes.  I really don't understand why it wouldn't have been possible to have Provenza, played by G.W. Bailey, take over the division.  The tension between the two and the division seems completely unnecessary to the plot of the show.  I personally believe that the transition from The Closer to Major Crimes could have been handled by making Provenza the lead and bringing in one or two more characters to work in the division in order to provide the necessary conflict thats needed for a show to survive.  The entire last season of The Closer it seemed as if Flynn and Provenza were somehow going to be almost like a duo comic act.  I saw none of that in this first episode.  To be honest, I didn't even attempt to laugh once and I basically laugh at everything.  Actually, Flynn seemed almost constipated and the only speaking that Provenza did was to whine to Assistant Chief Taylor about the indignity of putting Rayder ahead of him.  And what in the world is up with the plea-bargaining?  Why in the world would you make that the focus of the show?!?  You could just sense the tension in the room when that was going on and to be honest, I don't want to watch another Law and Order type show which is really what this seems to be turning into.  Why would I want to watch the police officers run around for about half the show to solve it and then watch all of their hard work be whittled away because the city doesn't have the money to pay for trials?  I personally don't want to watch week after week a different attorney coming in to plea-bargain so that we don't gain any back story on the crime or the criminals or victims and for the majority of the Major Crimes Division to be out of the picture.  I understand that they didn't want Rayder to attempt to be getting confessions as freakingly amazingly as Brenda but seriously there has got to be another way then making us watch plea-bargaining.  Also, not a huge fan of this new detective, Sykes.  She seems like a brown-noser, which is the last thing this show needs is for everything to be divided along gender lines.  And Rusty?  WTF?  I am just not feeling that dynamic.  Also, how is he going to be under adult supervision 24/7 if he's living at Rayder's house?  What, is Rayder going to bring him to work because, not gonna lie, I'm not a huge fan of Rusty's character.  He's wicked annoying.  If this show doesn't really start showcasing the other characters of the Major Crimes Division and doesn't stop this plea-bargaining shenanigans this show is going to get cancelled quickly.  I'm going to watch for another episode, but I seriously hope that I get to watch the Major Crimes Division actually have dialogue and interact with one another rather than watch Rayder with her horrible skin and ridiculous amount of hair.  Seriously, who is the hairstylist on the show and why in the world do you allow her hair which has obviously been treated before and is starting to get fried wear her hair down for all the world to see?  And why is it SO BIG?!?  Its very distracting.

Bottom Line: Major Crimes better change its act soon otherwise it will be a cancelled.  Fast.

Musical Serenity

I just made a splurge purchase yesterday for a pair of Bose headphones from Costco.  When I was making the purchase, I didn't even think twice about it, but once I brought them home I was a little freaked out over what I had done and I was seriously considering taking them back today.  Then I opened the box and there was no going back.  First off, I was wicked confused over the little itty bitty plug coming out of the left ear and I was kind of irritated as to why the hell Bose would make the cord about an inch long.  So I decided that they couldn't be that stupid and I almost busted the headset trying to "expand" the audio cord.  Just FYI if you ever get these headphones: they don't expand.  So don't waste your time to push every little inch of the headphones.  Don't pull at the headphones and think that somehow pulling the headphones apart is going to make the audio cord expand because they won't.  But for real, if you ever buy these headphones, just open up the holding case.  Then you'll realize that the rest of the audio cords are in the case...yeah.

Alright so I finally got it plugged into my laptop and I start listening to my iTunes.  I put on Adele.  Holy shit.  Serenity now.

EPICLY
AMAZING
SOUND

BUY
THEM
NOW

BEST
PURCHASE
IN
A
LONG
TIME.

I really wish that I had had these headphones when I was taking AP Music Theory in high school because I can hear just about every thing in these headphones.  I haven't heard music have this much depth and richness since I was sitting in a recording studio editing my audition tapes.  And the BASS!  HOLY CRAPOLA BATMAN!  I have no idea if anyone can hear the music from my headset but I feel like I'm at a live concert the bass on some of my music is rockin so hard.  LOVE IT!

Bottom Line:  No regrets.  These headphones are FANTASTIC!

Tres nouveau

Sorry I haven't updated in the past week.  Life has been kind of crazy.  Good but crazy.

So here are three new things I learned today:

1) The X-Men franchise is also making an alternate reality film.  It would have been cool if Star Trek hadn't rebooted their franchise the same way.  Btw, who knows when the new Star Trek film is coming out?  I need me some Chris Pine.

2) People really do associate Middle East archaeology with Indiana Jones and Nazis.

3) I have found the living manifestation of the "Old Guys" from the Muppets.

Not as cool as last time but I'll try to update more often.  Hope you all have a happy Friday!

Three New Things

I'm going to start something new based on something I read in the Game of Thrones series.  I'm currently on the fourth book of the series and, without giving anything away I hope, Arya Stark has to learn three new things everyday.  They don't have to be profound but I like the idea so I'm gonna try and do it every once in a while and see what happens.

1) Different rubber band shooting techniques are needed to achieve accuracy on targets at different angles.  For example, a shot across a petition requires a softer upward shot whereas a shot across workspaces can be a straight on power shot.

2) Rubberbands can get stuck into the vents at my work.

3) Icelands initials during the Olympics are ISE.  Not surprising but I didn't know that. Learned that by watching men's handball.

What are three things you learned today?

Frosty Stereotype

Here is the story of why stereotypes exist.

I am walking up the stairs from the first floor to the second to get on a faster elevator and also because I wanted to take the stairs.  A larger woman with a giant Wendy's bag and a super sized soda cuts me off.  Ok,that happens.  I get on the elevator and press the floor I want and the close door button, which of courses really just therefor decoration.  I mean let's be honest. Have you ever pressed the close elevator button and it actually closes before the person that you don't want to come on the elevator gets on.  Oh you have? Well Whoopdifreakindo.  It doesn't happen for me.  So I press the button and the supersize Wendy's customer gets on thee,evator.  Will the elevator hold with the extra weight of supersize Wendy's?  Will it?  Will I make it out to complain another day?  I did, but only just.  Fortunately the woman was very tired and got out on floor three.  Did I mention that we got on on floor two?

That people is why stereotypes exist.  Almost every stereotype has an element of truth.  This was a true story.  Thank you for your attention.

Inappropriate Bathroom Noises

(This is what I was thinking about during this distressing experience- have no fear, I did not bring my laptop into the bathroom and blog from there...)

Dear woman in the bathroom two stalls to my right,

Please stop making loud, inappropriate moaning noises while I am trying to go to the bathroom.  You are not the only person in there.  I know that you may not realize that, but seriously, from now on can you please just always imagine that there is always someone else in the bathroom with you who does not want to hear you getting off while you're taking a crap?  Its difficult enough for some people to go when theres someone else in there, but its even more difficult and distracting when an overly large woman cannot stop her pleasure moaning for a whole minute.  And yes,  I can say that you're a large woman seeing as you left your size 1X elastic waist band jeans in the stall between us.  Seriously woman, what in the world were you doing that you had to take off your ginormous jeans and then throw them into the stall between us.  Do you really get off by going to the bathroom?  Really?  Thats absolutely disgusting.  You made me sick to my stomach but I didn't want to stay in that bathroom any longer.  You truly know how to clear the room.  On that I give you props.  But really, next time, can you please get your kicks in the privacy of your own home.  And I pray that you're single.  Oh and don't tell me that those pants weren't yours.  I saw your sausage fingers reach under the stall to pick them up.  Those brown Minnetonka moccasins you saw push them towards you?  Yeah, I plan on burning them.  You were the last person to see them before they are consumed by the flames to rid them of their impurities.  And one last thing, the thank you after I pushed the pants towards you and the smile and hello you gave me when I was washing my hands does not make me like you.  Actually it made me wanna gag.  I think I would have preferred it if you hadn't attempted any kind of human interaction.  Then I could have at least pretended that you were a troll.  A giant, farting, moaning troll but no.  You had to make sure that I knew that you were human.  Just evil.  Just pure evil.

Sincerely,
The girl who just puked in her mouth

P.S. This goes out to Eppley Airfield- your bathrooms aren't the worst I've seen but for sanitation reasons, it might be best to put the soap dispensers more than 3 inches above the sink.  It makes it kind of difficult to wash your hands if your hands don't fit between the soap dispenser and the sink.  So all those people in your airport that just came out of the bathroom and have larger hands...yeah...enjoy.

Creativity vs Practicality

My time here in Omaha is nearly at an end.  Although I've complained a lot about the driving, I gotta say that I thoroughly enjoyed my time here and I will be sorry to leave.  On another note, I was having lunch with one of my classmates and somewhere in our really random, awkward conversation I brought the subject to books.  Shocker I know.  Anyways, I asked my classmate if he was reading something and he told me that he was reading a psychology book concerning two different types of mental processes, specifically a "fast" calculation of a situation that is based entirely upon intuition and previous experiences and a "slow" calculation in which the scene is processed in a way that takes into account the intuition and learned information.  Granted he was not able to articulate it like that but I'm assuming that was the gist of it.  Sounds like a basic social science theory merely put down in a book format with hundreds of examples as opposed to a specific academic drill but interesting nonetheless and something that I will probably look into.  (Does anyone know what this book is called?  Have you figured out which book it is based on my bizarre interpretation based on my classmates understanding of it...I can't remember...)

So the book that he was reading is not the point of this post.  The point is that he made a point of saying that he only reads "practical" books.  In other words, he only reads non-fiction books that he feels that he can apply immediately to real-life situations.  Interesting and everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but I was a little bit insulted that he was reading a book in which inference is of profound importance and yet he did not find the value in reading fiction.  In my mind, fiction is of tremendous value in our culture.  It defines and shapes us.  We learn about ourselves and others not only through the works of non-fiction but also through the ways in which people are able to discuss and describe their own world in a fictional way.  Creativity and imagination, in my opinion, should not be seen as being impractical.  On the contrary, the ability to think creatively fuels the fires of innovation and invention.  Even though fictional stories by definition are "fake," that does not mean that they are not practical in their own way.  As I have previously mentioned, the ability to think creatively and then to articulate those imagined thoughts and actions can demonstrate a peoples cultural heritage.  Fictional books can foster and reemphasize aspects of our culture that before were unconsciously a part of our daily lives.  Fictional books allow for the continued articulation of a person's culture.  Perhaps a fictional book may not tell you how to fix your engine, but it can clue you in to the love a culture has for its automobiles in a way that statistics and hard facts sometimes cannot properly convey.  What's my bottom line?  Just because you don't see the immediate practicality of a thing, it does not mean that it does not exist.  Don't disregard the power of the human imagination.  It is just as practical and everyday a thing as understanding the latest psychological opinions on the Western thought-process.

I apologize for the tirade and I want to say that my classmate did not say his opinion rudely or with malice.  Now I am merely stating mine.  What do you think of the value of fictional books?

Photos from:

http://blog.schoollibraryjournal.com/afuse8production/files/2012/06/HarryPotter1.jpg

http://buber.net/Blah/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/1776-mccullough.jpg

Where Are We?

Dear driver of Omaha,

Please note that a) you are not on the farm and b) we are not British.

a) You are not on the farm.  There are lines on the road and more importantly, other vehicles.  You know those things that make loud noises and cause air pollution and can also kill you if you get hit by them?  You know, cars.  Other cars.  Not just yours.  So please, do us all a favor, car makers created a wonderful thing called a back window.  Now I realize that you obviously don't use it because its covered in dirt and shit and you can't see out of it, but you see, I don't think it was put there to create feng shui in the car.  Call me crazy.  And I'm just throwing this out there, but perhaps it could be used to look out of.  Wow.  That is a crazy idea.  A clear, glass, window to look behind you when you're backing up?  What?!?  Woah now, I've gone on the crazy train, but bare with me.  Maybe, just maybe, if you cleaned your window and maybe just maybe if you worked on rotating your body to look out the window you would realize that the reason I'm laying on my horn (yes, that loud noise is not a duck or farm animal.  lets remember that were not on the farm right now) is because you're backing into me.  So, just a suggestion if you like my ideas on the purpose of a back window: clean your back window and start doing some freaking yoga so that you can turn your neck to see out of that newly cleaned back window.  Try out!  You might find that you'll have less dents on the back bumper of your car!  Best wishes!

b) We are not British.  I don't know if you all learned this, but we kind of fought this little war in 1776 and we wrote some documents that are kind of old and yellow and in a weird handwriting, but you know, hey, they're kind of old so I might understand if you forgot that we won our independence from the UK in 1781.  Ok, no big deal that you don't seem to realize that we live in the United States of America and not Great Britain.  Ok, no big deal.  George Washington is probably just the dude with the weird nose on your dollar bill.  I get it.  Its fine.  But for real.  We did actually win our independence and we've kind of not been a part of Great Britain for the past ohhhh 200+ years so, COULD YOU STOP DRIVING ON THE LEFT SIDE OF THE ROAD!  kthanx.

Have a wonderful day every eon!

Thoroughly confused Virginian

Old Market

Explored the Old Market again.  I had dinner at Upstream Brewing.  I got the fish and chips and honestly, they were fantastic.  Their beer-batter was to die for and they brought the chips with vinegar.  The only disappointing parts of the meal were this random "cucumber salad" in which the cucumbers looked sad and wilted and sick.  Thats kind of the only way of describing them.  Oh and they tasted that way too.  If you're gonna order this, try not to get the depressing cucumbers.  They just kind of look at you and you kinda just wanna puke.  Anyways, so the "cucumber salad" or whatever the hell it was was kind of depressing and I gotta say, for a microbrewery I was not impressed and underwhelmed.  I went during Happy Hour (which btw I totally recommend.  Half off any beer and half off appetizers.  Great deal) and I ordered the Capital Premium Pale Ale.  I absolutely hated it.  Seriously.  I couldn't even get half way through.  Life is far too short to drink a lousy beer.  So I didn't.  I wish I had ordered whatever the fish and chips were fried in because that beer tasted fantastic.  Note to self: ORDER THE FISH AND CHIPS BEER.  IT IS A FOOD ORGASM.  The end.  So go order yourself a succulent fish and chips.  In beer-batter.  Right now.  Imagine that wonderful golden fried gooeyness.

Are you salivating yet?  haha sucker.  I hope you're reading this after your workout.  :)

Anyways, after that I decided that I wanted to walk around some more.  I mean I paid $5 for parking.  I might as well get my moneys worth.  So I went over to this shop called Curbside Clothing.  I freaking loved it.  Ridiculously artsy.  Great paintings and photos on the walls.  The graphic designs on the clothes are all unique and actually have a meaning which is pretty sweet.  Also, the majority of the jewelry can be found on etsy.com and if you're like me and you're a pretend hipster, then you love etsy.com  So needless to say, check out the link to the store.  It was quite awesome.  I also visited my favorite little hippie store in the Old Market, The Souq.

Once again, loved it.  Basically for anyone who has ever taken a class in the UVA Anthro Dept, let me just say this.  They would either call this store you're typical exotic or would probably be running the store.  Its one of the two.  Anyways, I'm always a sucker and I love it because it makes me feel cool and unique.  All in all, a very productive evening.  Hope you all are having a good one too!

For more photos of the Old Market, click here

NOTE: All photos on this site were taken by me.  :)  Let me know if you like them!

Red Means Go And Green Means Stops

Ok so like everything in the Midwest, everything is pretty spread out making driving an absolute necessity to get to and fro.  With that in mind, I have therefore spent a lot of time in my rented Nissan Rogue.  Not a bad car all in all.  Ok anyways, to the point.  So today I was driving to Panera and its less than a mile from my hotel.  How long did it take me to drive to it?  Over ten minutes.  Why?  Because people here quite frankly don't know how to drive.  I'm not saying that I'm the best driver in the world, but in comparison to many of the drivers here, I'm an absolute freakin genius.  There's a ridiculous amount of traffic between my hotel and the Panera and there are two major causes for this.  One, theres a bit of construction going on.  Nothing huge but a little bit.  Two, people here do not know what to do with traffic lights.  For real.

I mean the light turns green and people stare at.  Quite literally stare it.  "Hmmm, the light has changed colors.  Its kind of this greenish tint looking thing...does that mean that I go?  Maybe, yeah?  Yeah I should.  Oh wait, now its turning again.  Oh shit now its the bright color, what is that again?  Oh yeah yellow.  Oh shit red.  GO!"  Honestly, I believe that must be the thought process going on.  Otherwise how else would you explain people not going when its green and two or three cars turning when its red?  Perhaps in Nebraska, the law is that you go when its red and stop when its green.  Totally possible.  Or perhaps the entire population is color blind.  That could definitely be it.  Or aliens invaded the entire city and brainwashed them into believing that red means go and green means stop so that they could force the entire city into a gridlock and therefore force their control over the people by saying that they will alleviate their gridlock by ending traffic altogether.  The people rejoice.  Then there are no more cars and everyone has to walk in 50% humidity in 90 plus degree heat and they all become walking heat alien-controlled zombies.  Don't get become alien-controlled zombies.  Learn that green means go and red means stop.

The end.

Adventures on Route 75

Today I still had a cold but I couldn't stand the idea of just sitting in my hotel room while there was a whole state that I had yet to discover so I set out this morning with the concept that I would be going on an adventure.

Ok by morning I mean that I woke up at like 1100 compliments of NyQuil...so like a 20-somethings version of morning?

Anyways, so once I jumped out of bed, got ready, and decided that I wanted to try out Big Mama's Kitchen.  I was supposed to go last night with some people from my class but I was feeling like crap so I couldn't.  So this morning I decided to rectify this loss of wonderful southern palatableness and I went in search of Big Mama's Kitchen.  According to my iPhone it was only about 5 miles away in a part of town that I had never been to so that didn't seem like a big deal.  Today was supposed to be an adventure right?  Ok so I start driving towards Big Mama's and so far so good.  No big problems.  Then I realize that I'm in an area that had been its own town in the 1940s or 50s and had only recently been gobbled up by that monolithic metropolis that is Omaha, Nebraska.  I think it was called Benson...anyways moving on.  So I start driving through this area and its definitely not the best place in the world but I'm to myself, hey you got this far, you might as well keep going.  So I do.  And finally I see an old school complex.  Its pretty old school.  I would take a guess that it was built in the late 1800s- early 1900s.  You know one of those with multiple buildings and the buildings themselves aren't cookie cutter and are made out of stone?  Thats the best that I can do to describe them.  So there's a sign that says, "BIG MAMA'S TURN HERE!!!!" And the sign has Big Mama's face on it so I think, well hey there Big Mama.  Why yes, I'll turn where your giant head is telling me to turn.  Thank you for showing me the way.  So like I said, it takes me into the older school complex.  Well thats it.  Its a circular, fenced in school complex.  So I drive around twice and I'm pretty pissed.  I mean wouldn't you be too?  Big Mama told me a big fat lie.  so right about now, I ain't likin Big Mama.  Big Mama and I are gonna have a chat if and when I ever get into that damn place.  So like I said, I drive around and finally I can't take it anymore and I decide, eff this, I'm going to Popeyes and I'm getting the fast-food version of Southern food because either way, I was getting biscuits this morning, with or without Big Mama's help.  So I pull up next to one of the buildings and I start to try and find where the nearest Popeyes is so I can get my biscuits on when I look up and I see Big Mama's face.  Again.  Peering out of a window of one of the school buildings.  And theres a giant sign underneath her big grinning face that says, "OPEN."  Well sink me, if it ain't Big Mamas Kitchen.  In a school.  No I mean actually in the school.  Like you walk up to a door that could have been just about anyones high school with the metal rounded rectangular handle.  Then you walk into the yellow linoleum stair floors and theres another big giant sign that says up here to biscuits young southerner.  Follow Big Mama to biscuit heaven.  Well, I do.  Even though I'm not gonna lie, I'm a little freaked out.  And I walk into what definitely used to be a school cafeteria that has now been converted into a restaurant...kind of.  I mean it was obviously a school cafeteria.  Thankful the food was definitely not cafeteria food.  Big Mama's Kitchen was awesome.  All of the food was made to order and it was fabulous, southern soul food.  Just what the body needed.  :)  So after that I decide that I'm gonna drive down Route 75 and just kind of see where the road takes me.  I, of course, get lost multiple times.  *multiple expletives- use for approximately 20 minutes*  On the road and I have no idea where the hell I'm going and I'm pulling over every once in a while on the side of the road and am taking photos.  Yes, I know.  I'm weird, but seriously there was so much freaking corn.  And the scenery looked like something out of Grapes of Wrath or Of Mice and Men with the dilapidated farmhouses and the telephone posts just going on for miles and miles, going far past the line of sight.

For some like me who has never seen that before, it was quite an awesome thing.  So anyways, I keep driving.  And driving.  And driving.  And even though the signs keep saying that I'm getting closer to Nebraska City, I swear that its actually creeping a little farther ahead for every mile I gain on it.  Laughing just a little bit to itself.  For real though.  So I get to Nebraska City and I've gotta say that it was one of the most eerie places I've ever been.  I don't know whether it was because it was Sunday or whether there was something going on but there was basically no one in town.  And I mean basically no one.  I was there for 30 plus minutes and I saw 5 people.  It was seriously like a ghost town.

Omaha may be thriving after the economic downturn but let me tell you something, it doesn't really seem that the rest of Nebraska is getting much help.  That was the first time that I really saw the economic pressures slap me in the face.  You think you understand on the East Coast but somehow I don't think that we get it.  Or that we don't understand it as well as we think.  Just something to think about if you're reading this.  Anyways, I decide to get the hell of there because I was afraid that it was gonna turn into some sort of Texas Chainsaw Massacre or some effed up town out of the mind of Stephen King or Alfred Hitchcock.  For real though.

I got out of there, went back on Route 75, took more photos.  Went to another little town that had a population of 6,655 people.  Thats less than the number of people in my high school.  What I can say that I've learned today is that there is so much more to America than I could have ever understand by reading books and watching TV or documentaries.  There is truly no better way to understand an area than by actually going out and being a part of it.  Really.  There is so much that you miss by just sitting at home and experiencing the same thing over and over again.  You can see photos and movies but you'll never understand the significance of certain scenes and plots until you've experienced that part of the country. I question everyone to just go to one place entirely new to them sometime this year.  Just once.  Do as the locals do.  Think about why they're doing what they're doing.  Drive on their roads and think about what you're seeing and how its different from what you normally experience.  Look at the signs.  Look at what they think is important enough to put on a sign.  You'd be shocked at how much that will tell you.  Anyways, I hope that everyone had a wonderful day.

Note: All photos taken by me.

More photos can be found here - again all of these photos have been taken by me.  if you're going to share them, its totally cool with me.  just let me know.  i'm a bit of an egotist and it makes me feel good inside.  :)  Again, enjoy and I hope that you all haven't died of boredom yet.

Book Review- Bloodline by James Rollins

I have a cold and I'm not at home so what does that mean?  It means that I've basically been sitting around all day eating, reading, watching TV, uploading photos, and now it seems, unnecessarily updating my blog.  So, here's a review of James Rollins's new novel The Bloodline that came out at the end of June 2012.

I pre-ordered the book on Amazon Prime in April or May.  I can't really remember now, but either way, I was wicked excited that this book was coming out.  I have been a big fan James Rollins's Sigma Force series for the past 3-4 years and every book has been more exhilarating than the next.  Ok, I should probably give you a wee bit of background on the series.  Sigma Force is a top-secret covert agency embedded in DARPA, a scientific research department of the Department of Defense.  The novels are all extraordinarily fast-paced and Mr Rollins has somehow figured out the recipe for the perfect blend of action, history, and science to keep these novels going.  Like I said before, I have been a fan for a few years now and have not been disappointed.  Mr Rollins' last novel, The Devil Colony, was absolutely tremendous and breathtaking.  I couldn't put that book down and I was seriously upset when it was over.  That was made me so excited for Bloodline.  All of the teasers for the book made it seem like it was going to answer quite a few questions about the Guild, Sigma's archnemesis and the most evil bad guys in the world pulling all the strings on all of the worlds most heinous crimes.  So needless to say, I was excited.  Even the prologue to Bloodline makes you think that theres going to be quite a bit of history and science intertwined in this book.  Definitely more than action.  Well I could not have been more wrong.  Unlike his previous novels, Mr Rollins was unable to find that perfect blend of action, science, and history.  At least in my opinion.  He built some of the new characters wonderfully, especially Tucker Wayne and his dog Kane but then, after setting them up beautifully and making them such an intricate part of the first 2/3 of the book, he relegates them to the back.  That was annoying and upsetting because so much time had been spent on building the character only for the character to become almost 2D by the end with no real emotions or sentiments.  Also, unlike his other novels where he masterfully embeds history and science and weaves it in such a way into the action that it doesn't take away from it, he absolutely drops the ball.  He has a hard time weaving the historical and the scientific together and when it is brought into the action sequences it just becomes a mess.  The historical aspects, which needed a far deeper explanation, was really shoved into the last 40 pages of the novel.  This was extremely unfortunate because in the end you realize that this was the driving force behind all of the actions and will probably be the cause for the next novel.  But like I said, Mr Rollins does not give any kind of detail into this historical conspiracy that he created, making it almost seem like he doesn't have a grasp on his own fictional history.  I hope that in his next novel, he delves much deeper into that history and more specifically, decides definitely upon the ambiguous historical statements and comments that drove this novel at the very end.  For this kind of novel, historical accuracy does not matter, but what does matter is for the author to have a clear understanding of what history he wants to be portrayed and as a history major, I had a hard time trying to grasp what exactly he was getting at.  As I have said multiple times, I am still a fan of James Rollins and his Sigma Force series, but I do hope that his next novel does not follow the same rules that his novel did.  I think that would be a profound disappointment.

Rating: 3 out of 5 Stars

Other Suggestions: Sigma Force Novels: The Devil Colony; Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child novels

Let me know what you think of this novel as well or if you have any other book suggestions!

Omaha Mavericks

For the past week I've been in Omaha, Nebraska.  I've never been to the Midwest so this is very much a new experience for me.  Its one thing to study the differences in culture in other countries, but its quite a different thing to study it in your own country.  Ok, I'm not technically in Omaha to study Midwestern culture, but one cannot help but notice the differences between the people of Omaha and my own hometown.  For one thing, the majority of people drive very slow and all of the lines on the road seem to be more of a suggestion than anything else.  Also, Omaha is considered to be a big city and I have no doubt that in the Midwest is probably is, but I can drive from my hotel at the outskirts of the city to the very edge of the city center on a Saturday at noon in about 7 minutes.  For real.  Anyone from DC knows that going 7 minutes in DC means that you've probably gone through 2 traffic lights.  Maybe.  If you're lucky.  Ok, so in reality I'm here for a class, which is also kind of weird because this the first time that I've ever been on another college campus taking course since I graduated in May 2011.  Its a nice campus, like I mentioned last time.  I can walk the entire length of the main campus in ten minutes.  I know because I walk it every day.

Also, I've been told many a time that the people of the Midwest are extraordinarily friendly.  For the most part they are, but I gotta say, a lot of the students seem absolutely bewildered when I ask them a question, but then again maybe I'm asking really difficult questions.  You know, like, "Where is the library?" or "Where is the Arts and Sciences Building?"  You know, very difficult, hardly ever used buildings that happen to hold the majority of the classes.  Or I guess they don't utilize their library?  A shame really.  Oh, and for all of the tour guides at the University of Nebraska at Omaha (aka UNO or as I call it: uno), I am not a student at UNO.  My UVA flip flops and backpack might have given that away and also, if I'm asking you where the library is, I probably don't go there.  Either that or I'm the shittiest student known to man.  Either or.

Also, for the students at UNO.  Please stop staring at me because I'm wearing a dress.  No but for real.  I realize that you all somehow have some magical, Midwestern gene that somehow allows you to wear dark jeans, socks, and sneakers and somehow not sweat, but I unfortunately do not have that gene and therefore would be a walking rainstorm if I wore those outfits.  In other words, I wear a dress because unlike you all, I sweat.  But for real, why does no one on that campus wear dresses and seriously, is it that weird for a girl to wear a dress that you need to stare?  Its over 97 degrees here.  How is that possible?  And you all aren't sweating!?!  Mutants, thats what you are.  UNO Mavericks.  Nay I tell you.  UNO Mutants you should be called.

Also, I need some advice on something.  So I joined the UNO gym while I'm here in Omaha.  I like the gym facility.  Its new and its clean and thats basically all I can ask for.  But I really gotta ask.  Is it really too much to answer my question as to where the women's locker room is?  Am I really bothering you with that question or would you prefer that I strip down naked in front of you and perhaps then you'll understand the point of my question.  Oh, and if I ask you where the cleaning wipes are, please don't ask me "Don't you know where they are?"  Obviously I don't dumbshit.  Do you think that I would be bothering you with this if I knew?  Idiot.  But for real.  Students of UNO.  You all seem extremely nice, but seriously, don't be shocked when people come up and ask you questions.  They're not trying to bother you or ruin your day.  They just want to experience your school.  So be kind and for goodness sake just answer the question as best as you can.  Oh, and the answer, "The Arts and Sciences Building is past the pointed thing and just keep walking and its somewhere over there."  First off, that pointed thing is called a Campanile.  Its on a sign on the building.  Or you could call it the giant phallic symbol in the middle of your campus.  That would work too.  But seriously, the pointed thing?  And its kind of over there somewhere?  There are maybe a dozen buildings on your campus.  You seriously can't tell me where that building is in more precise terms than its past the pointed thing and its somewhere over there?  Seriously, give your school some credit and start using words that describe the location of buildings on your campus in more precise terms.

Anyways, the class is interesting and the campus is actually very pretty.  Stay tuned for more updates from Omaha!

Oh Summer TV Shows

Has anyone else noticed that in the month of June there were basically no new TV shows on?  Especially on USA or TNT.  Was anyone else hurt by this?  It made me cry a few time, especially when TNT insisted on putting out teaser trailers for The Closer.  Or when TV Guide insisted on posting beautiful photos of Matt Bomer from White Collar.  It was just evil.  Pure and simple.  TNT and USA, have you read the US Constitution.  Cruel and unusual punishment is prohibited in the US.  Yeah thats right.  June was cruel and unusual punishment.  But I must say, thank you for finally putting all of my favorite shows back on TV...even if they're all on at the same time and I'm in Nebraska without my DVR. Its alright.  I'll make it work because you, cruel abusing TV Cable companies that control my happiness.  You have forced my hand.  You have found my weakness and are abusing it to the tenth degree.  How can you stand yourself!?!  Knowing that people are suffering without their summer shows.  Cruel.

But I must say, White Collar.  Wow.  You never fail to impress.  Last season was good, but this episode is better than all of Season 3.  Multiple scenes of Matt Bomer with his shirt off and he put on some weight and has a scruffy beard.  Wow.  No seriously.  Breath taken away.  I can't freaking take it.  And Mozzie.  Love you.  Oh and Neil's back story.  GET ON WITH IT!  I NEED MORE ASAP!!!  Oh and please keep Neil shirtless with the scruffy face.  Its wonderful.  Absolutely wonderful.  And magical.  And makes me so happy.  The story line is of course fantastic and the episode isn't even over yet.  So bottom line:  White Collar is back and better than ever.  Highly recommend.  :)  Enjoy!

Oh and if you're not watching White Collar right now.  Stop what you're doing.  No seriously.  Stop reading this blog and watch the show.  It will make your life a better place.

Traffic Psychology

Ok but theres so much more to traffic than that.  If you leave at a certain time every day then you tend to see the same people over and over again.  You tend to learn that the mini-van driver isn't a soccer mom, but a crazy dad thats obviously late for work and is chugging coffee because of the way that he's swerving all around the lane.  Or the red mini-van that has about 6-7 local high school tags for different sports and 3 college stickers showing off their wonderful ability to reproduce.  Yeah, you know the one that always seems to be even with you in the right lane no matter how fast you go?  Yeah, that one. Or the little grey old as shit Honda with the Peace Frogs bumper sticker and the Clinton stickers that always feels the need to speed their car to about 80 to get in front of you and then slam on their brakes and go 55.  Yeah, theres some real peace and love there.  Or the Prius.  The gas-saving, eco-friendly Prius.  I think its wonderful that Prius drivers want to save the environment.  Thats sweet.  But lets be honest, thats not why half of the people that drive Prius' drive them.  They drive them because they save you a shit-ton on gas and you can drive in the HOV lanes.  Yeah, don't give me your environmental nonsense.  Have you noticed that ever Prius driver feels the need to only go to 50 mph in the left lane?  Is that friendly to your fellow human beings?  Is it?  I think not.  You want to save the environment but in reality, you're harming your fellow human beings sanity.  No, but for real.  If you're driving a Prius, please, if you insist on saving your gas and therefore not going above 50 mph, do us all favor and drive in the right lane.  If you just did that, people would probably dislike Prius drivers less.  But seriously, you really tend to know the drivers around you.  You realize quickly that if you get behind the Beck's truck over by Fair Oaks, you're probably gonna be in trouble because after many days of observation and analytical trends, it can be easily determined that the driver is uncomfortable driving next to the barrier.  Or the Lexus SUV with the Oakton High School stickers that always seems to go at a nice pace.  Get behind the Cougar car and you'll have a pleasant journey to school.  Get behind the burgundy Camry from the early 90s and you can be assured of a salute and a constant jockeying for first place.  There will be no peace behind the 90s Camry or any of their kind.  It is wise to be aware of the cars on the road with you so that you can work on having the most enjoyable trip to work as possible.

I would also like to discuss the car that cries BRAKE.  You know, kind of like the boy that cries wolf.  Its the person that can't get their foot off of the brake pedal.  The person who obviously doesn't realize that by taking your foot off of the gas pedal you also have the ability to slow down.  The person who, for absolutely no apparent reason, feels the need to put their brakes on because they might be going 61 mph instead of 60.  Or decides to go a bit rebellious, drive up to 70 mph, feel some sort of Catholic guilt, and immediately brake to 55 mph.  Such a wonderful human being.  Giving those of us behind them such high hopes and then just as quickly bashing them into the ground.  True disappointment.  It hurts me to my core.  But I think the person that cries wolf the most is the person that is paying attention more to what is happening in the lane next to them than in their own lane.  You know, the person in the left lane that secretly wants to be in the right lane, even kind of swerves over to the right lane, almost this a car in the right lane because they want to be in that lane, and most importantly, always does what the right lane is doing.  For example.  When coming upon a green light, for some reason many in the right lane tend to brake for no apparent.  The right-lane wannabe will then brake as well.  Even if there is no one in front of them and no logical reason to brake.  Its like they were peer-pressured into being in the left lane to begin with.  Oh no, I gotta be in the left lane because thats where all the cool fast cars are.  Right lane is for old people and slow pokes.  Nooooo I would never be seen in the right lane.  Well buddy, let me give you a piece of advice.  Go with what your heart tells you.  You were meant to be in the right lane.  Please, don't let us hold you back from achieving your greatest driving potential.  Really.  We of the left lane only want the best for you.  There will be no taunting or ridicule.  Only happiness and support.

On that note, HAPPY DRIVING! :)

Once Upon a TV Show

So now its May and summer is near and unfortunately that means that some of my favorite TV shows are nearing their season finales butttttt some are starting back up again!!! yayyy!!! Oh cable TV, thank goodness you put on all of your shows during the summer, otherwise what would I watch during summer vacation.  Oh wait...yeah, I've just hit that disappointing realization that this is the first summer ever that I will not have off.  Do you know just how depressing that is?  But thats alright because I am determined to make it fun and enjoyable, even if I cannot sit out tanning all day like I usually do.  I guess this means less chance of skin cancer for me?  Lame.   Anyways, I have other plans for getting over the summer blues, such as contemplating WHAT IS GOING ON IN ONCE UPON A TIME!!!!!  Ok seriously, BEST.SHOW.ON.TV.  Yes, I am that girl that is wildly obsessed with the show.  Yes I do watch the sneak peeks and freak out over them and yes, I do spend more time than I should at work talking about it with other girls, but you know what, ITS NECESSARY!  Because for all of you weirdos out there that haven't seen this show, its written by the same crazies that wrote LOST which means that there are way more twists and turns than should be allowed, hereto it is required and necessary for me to have to talk the show out.  The season finale is this Sunday and there are way too many questions that still need to be answered.  Number one is not even from the show itself but from the nut cases over at ABC.  Hey, ABC, I don't know if you've noticed, but Once Upon a Time is the hottest thing on TV (no but for real the ratings actually say that), so would you mind renewing it so that I don't have a heart attack because seriously, if you don't renew, I'm gonna hope and pray that Regina rips out my heart so that I can't feel like the Huntsman.  Oh the Huntsman.  Ok really, who saw that coming because I didn't.  I read an article like a month ago talking about the fact that the Huntsman is only dead in our world and not in Fantasyland soooooo theres hope for our wonderful accented friend to come back.  Writers are you reading this.  We need more scruffy accented men in our lives.  BRING.HIM.BACK.  kthanx.  So anyways, I'm just gonna throw some things out there and I'm sorry if you haven't been watching the series, but there are major spoilers coming in this post so you might wanna stop reading.  Or continue reading and realize just how pathetic and incredibly worthless your life is without this show.  Good.  Now that I've got your attention with my seemingly overly dramatic view of your life (its not really, its a fact), lets get back to where I was going.  Oh, so here are some things to think about before the season finale.


1) Will you be having apple martinis while viewing in honor of the evil queen and in hoping for Henry's full recovery.  Its so cruel to harm a child but it was necessary.  Emma is a bit of a dumbass and kinda needed this.  But Henry, I wish you the best and I hope that you get well soon because although I find your voice to be whiny, I'd rather not have a child die on this show.  That would be sad.  And its a Disney-owned channel so that would seriously be a downer.
2) If you believe that Henry will wake up, how do you think it will happen?
3) what think you of the Mad Hatter? Personally, he's so freaky that I love his character.  He scares the crap out of me but its still awesome.
4) Does anyone else remember Katherine/Abigail's lover (Frederick?) coming to her rescue in the woods after she got into the car accident?  Where in the world is he?!?
5) Did anyone see the Stranger being Pinocchio before that episode?  Anyone?  Yeah I didn't think so.  Seriously awesome plot twist.
6)What is your favorite episode?  This is a serious toughy for me so I'm gonna have to really think about it.
7) Think of the character development that you like the least.  Mines easily the Cinderella character.  She sucks.
8) Can someone please explain to me how, if Henry is the only child who's aging, how he can be at school with kids who have been 10 years old for like 28 years?  Someone please explain this to me.  How can everyone else see that he's growing up but no one else is getting over.  Seriously, Hallmark must be losing a lot of money on those birthday cards.
9) Also, is it bad that I think its hilarious that the most awful place that they're sent to is Maine?  My family's from Maine so I think that its absolutely hilarious.  For those of you who are reading this and know my mother, your image of her reaction to this fact is probably dead on.  Words cannot describe just how beautiful that reaction was.
10) Oh and Mr Gold.  I freaking love him.  I realize that I'm not supposed to and every time I get a handle on him, he screws up my opinion but he's so freaking good and I love how the actor really changes his mannerisms depending on which world he's acting.  Its seriously a joy to watch even if he is the best bad/good/bad guy ever. But for real, reactions on him.  Good/bad/the ugly/all of the above?  I will accept any of these answers with ample and logical justification.

So these are just a few of my comments on the show.  I may or may not have another post concerning Once Upon a Time before the season finale.  Seriously, if you want, post comments so I can see what everyone's thinking.  The show is so awesome and yet so confusing in some places that its fun to hear others opinions.

Oh and for all of you men that claim that they have never watched the show, I heard four guys in line behind me in Dunkin Donuts talking about how much they enjoy the show.  They were talking in whispers.  I most definitely responded.  It was magical.

May you wear your heart on your sleeve...and keep it as your own.  ):

It's who's day?

A lot has happened since my last post, but I won't even attempt to relate it herew nor would I think that people would be interested. Instead, let me tell you of some new people that I have become aware of in the past month. One person that I have recently become are of is someone that I had recently noticed previously but had not really thought much of other than the casual notion that he was probably insane. Over the past month I have become increasingly aware that not only was my original notion correct, but more correct in ways that I never thought possible. Now I will not state all of his crazies in this one posting but I'd like you to muse on a concept and just think about what it means to you. What does Tuesday mean to you? Have you thought about it? Are you staring at the computer confused? We you wondering wtf Im talking about? Let me tell you what this extraordinarily gentlemen told one of my coworkers. Tuesday is the day of Mars. As such he wears red in honor of him. Ok let me tell you what happened. I have a friend who can imitate this guys vice so perfectly that my skin feels like its crawling every time he does it. Soooo recently he wore a red shirt to work and then informed me that our extraorindary friend was wearing a red shirt too. A first I tout he was full of it. Then I realized that they were both in fact wearing red short sleeved button down shirts. And that he had worn the red shirt on purpose. I told my friend that he should inform the extraorindary man that he liked his outfit that day. My friend said that he wouldnt do it without an audience. At the time I thought it ridiculous but I understand his rationale. Some things are meant to be shared. This was one of them. Sooo a bunch of doing our usual coffee club thing in the afternoon bump into our extraordinary friend and my other friend just can't help himself. He has to go and tell our extraordinary friend just how much he likes his shirt. Their matching shirts. Instead of mentioning the fact that they are both wearing the same shirts, our extraordinary friend says the following sentence: "I wear red on Tuesday in honor of Mars." No he was not doing it to pull our tail. No, none of us were expecting it. I therefore did something that horrifies me. I started laughing so hard that I almost peed myself. I had to run out of the area so that i could stop biting my fist which wasalmost about to bleed. No for real, thats how hard i was biting into my fist to stop myself from laughing. I couldnthelp it. I just wasn't expecting that response. No normal human being would expect that response as their real, true answer to the comment of, I like your shirt. I gotta say, our extraordinary friend did one on me. This I will say to him. Thank you for giving me a greater appreciation and respect for Tuesdays. I hope that you all have a greater respect for it too. Happy Tuesday! :)

Dementors

So I did have a really good, funny post that I was gonna post but unfortunately this day as sucked all life out of me.  Not like the 5 Hour Energy yesterday, but rather that feeling that time has literally stopped. Its that feeling  you get when look out a wonderful, clean, huge window towards a cloudless blue sky and you just know that its got to be beautiful out.  You just know it.  Then you make the mistake of checking weather.com and it gives you that bright, comic looking sun that just screams at you to go outside.  Then you see the perfect temperature underneath the sun.  Then you look out the window again.  And the pouty face comes.  Bottom lip out.  Eyes looking longing into the distance and suddenly those windows come a cage.  A cruel, cruel cage from which you can’t escape.  I mean its right there.  And then its frigid where you’re sitting on top of everything else.  So instead of being able to show everyone your new spunky Spring top, your forced to hide it under a sweater if you were smart enough to bring one, or if you’re like me you have to hide it underneath your North Face so that, although you’re trying really to hide the fact that all you want to do is escape and frolic freely in the sunlight, it just gives it away.  Everyone knows and although you try telling everyone, “No, I’m not thinking about leaving.  Its just cold in here.”  Everyone knows.  Everyone knows.  And the cycle begins all over again.  This is what the Dementors Kiss feels like.  If you don’t know what that is…I don’t really have anything to say.  I think that just proves that either you have quite literally been living under a rock in the Trobriand Islands or you’re one of those people who tries to go against trends.  Well that wasn’t a trend.  It was merely another depiction of reality.  I just proved it.  I’m living it.  That’s right.  I am.  Get over it.  But for real though, today has been weird.  Not only has time been moving slower than usual (yes, it has. Just accept it.  Denial is a drug, duh.) but I swear people have been acting more unusual than normal.  I mean I just read an article by the Brookings Institute, a very reputable Think Tank, and the author dated the article for March 12, 2012.  And he published it today.  Yeah.  That’s right.  Don’t believe me?  Heres the link.  http://www.brookings.edu/articles/2012/03_syria_hamid.aspx  The dementors had sucked me so dry that I almost believed it.  Almost.  But you can’t fool this Gryffindor that easily (Yes I am a Gryffindor and yes I have been using a lot of parenthesis.  Sorry, I feel the need to have multiple internal dialogues at the same time.  Its part of the dementors sucking my soul today.)  That’s right.  I figured it out you tricksty trickster.  But you know what, he’s probably a Slytherin so I mean, that’s completely acceptable for them.  Totally something Crabbe or Goyle would do.  You know, like when Crabbe managed to change races from the Second film to the 7th Film.  Just like that.  So now you understand  how I feel.    Thanks for reading and I hope that you have a dementor-less type day! http://pinterest.com/pin/79376012151902231/ http://pinterest.com/pin/144959681725519369/

I'm Not The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo

So as I have said before, I’m in a class for basically the rest of the month, which at this point feels like the rest of my life because I’m not entirely sure how I’m going to get through it. Its not that I’m not learning because the information is actually fascinating (I know, big nerd right here), but we have these virtual days where we’re supposed to do work and seriously, I don’t understand who they think they’re dealing with or perhaps the people in my class are this slow but I am quite literally editing papers and briefings 2 and 3 times over. Unnecessarily.  Anyways, one of the big things in this class is “Collaboration.”  Aka, they wanted to teach the class about Social Media.  Great.  Maybe you couldn’t tell, but I kinda already know how to use it.  I mean its cool and all, but seriously, I don’t want to spend 2 days going over the very, very basics of the usages of Social Media. Nor do I want the instructors to leave so that I’m sitting in a classroom with some of my classmates who have never used social media.  When the instructors leave its like the floodgate opens.  Normally I just ignore all of my classmates technical questions and just zone out and think about all of the potential plot twists and fillers for Once Upon a Time, so you can imagine how angry I was when I was thinking about who that dude from Covert Affairs is (btw I think hes Grimm) and I was interrupted to answer some computer questions. Social Media questions I can answer.  Hardware questions I cannot.  For real people.  Just because I am under the age of 25 does not make an IT wiz.  I know that is shocking to all of you because for some reason people have this notion that everyone under 25 is some sort of naturally born hacker.  That understanding the finer parts of computers is part of our generation.  Well it kinda is.  But I’m not normal.  And I’m a Mac kid.  So no, I do not know how to fix your stupid Windows problems.  Nor do I know why your system actually smells like its burning.  But if I had to take a wild guess, I’d say that its because you have too many programs running at once, plus the fact that your foot is on the tower and its tipped sideways.  That could potentially do it.  But again, I am not an IT person.  Again, I know shocking.  But seriously, my age does not qualify me as an IT expert.  Its just not how it works.  But one thing I can tell you.  For goodness sake, when you’re responding to someone via IM, please, please, please do not @ tag them and think that they can magically know that you’re IMing thing.  Seriously, that’s not the way it works.  And it especially doesn’t work when you put a space between the @ symbol and the name. And what especially especially doesn’t help is when the instructors are doing that and then use it as an example as to how to properly communicate with people via IM.  Yeah.  Nor is it productive to give trick questions at the beginning of a class and then make a pun out of the question.  First, no one likes puns.  That’s why you either get the uncomfortable laugh that’s more like a “WTF?” in laugh form or you get crickets.  Unless you really like making people uncomfortable, just don’t do those jokes.  And for goodness sake, once no one has laughed at your joke, don’t take the silence as applause.  But for real.  Its not.  Its more like our utter horror that you just first, gave us a trick question and then acted like we were stupid, and then second, made a pun out of it.  Its just not funny.  And when you’re going to use the Mayhem guy as a joke for GPS, for goodness sake do it right.  Seriously, how do you screw that up?!?  RECALCULATING! RECALCULATING! RECALCULATING!  How do you not remember that when you’re using it as a joke?  Its one word.  Its not REPROGRAMMING!  That’s not funny.  Anyways, be prepared for more goodness tomorrow afternoon after my full day of being in a classroom learning environment.  Would you want me to be in your class? J   Also, to the red KIA that was in front of me this morning.  Your bumper sticker.  “Guns Save Lives.”  You’re right, they can sometimes.  But your driving…does not do that.  So please, USE YOUR BLINKER because maybe you didn’t realize this, but YOU TOO CAN SAVE LIVES!  Thanks and have a pleasant gun-free day.

5 Hour Energy

Have you ever hit that point in the day where you just cannot go on.  You know that 3 PM feeling that 5 Hour Energy makes it money off of.  Even if you don’t use 5 Hour Energy (which btw I do not after I witnessed the horrifying spectacle that my friend became after drinking it while studying for finals), you’d be lying if you didn’t know what I was talking about.  You know, its that feeling you get that you absolutely cannot go on.  That the world has to come to an end.  That you can do no more.  That even the most exciting of situations would fade to nothingness in your current state.  The computer screen begins to become blurry as your mind wanders off.  You stare off into space and not in an intellectual kind of way but the kind of way that screams for immediate aid.  Well, I’m in that state but unfortunately I have come to realize that once I’ve hit that point, I’m either a vegetable and should be taken off of life support or if I absolutely must get something done, I can only do it with excessive amounts of noise.  Like right now.  I just made this noise that’s somewhere between an elephant noise and a high-pitched fart…but with my mouth.  Yes, that does sound disgusting and no its really not that bad.  If you’ve heard me do it, then you know what I’m talking about.  Anyways, get your minds out of the gutter and pay attention to what I’m writing about.  So I just forced myself to make that noise because I know that I want to write this but at the same time my eyes are extra wide, my lips are curled in a ridiculous grin and I can’t stop dancing to my music because I’m afraid that if I stop, I might never get back up.  Earlier, when this situation began to overtake my senses, I felt the need for entrance music.  That’s right.  I sang myself entrance music.  Then I felt the need to make different sounds for opening desk drawers, like attempting to recreate the Law and Order sound.  You know what I’m talking about and if you don’t, then you’re not American.  Sorry.  Anyways, I opened my email and immediately began singing the Imperial March from Star Wars.  It was definitely appropriate.  I also can’t stop spinning in my chair which has an unfortunate habit of making this clicking noise at every half turn and it probably doesn’t help that I simulate a gust of wind as I spin or when I want to go fast, I pretend that I’m speeding.  Oh yeah.  I’m at that point in the day.  Be thankful that you don’t sit by me.  But now I must bid you all adieu as I have decided that my time would be better spent using my new Rubber Band gun to shot at my neighbors area.  Specifically his stuffed dog.  Its going down.   Have a wonderful, noisy day and don’t let anyone get you down.  If being noisy is what makes you happy, then never regret the fact that your co-workers are probably plotting horrific ways to make your life miserable.  Just remember.  It was worth it for that moment of sanity and happiness. 

Can You Hear Me Now?

So I like said in a pervious post, I haven't had a whole lot of time to post, especially because I don't have access to to this blog at work. Well I'd like to share a few stories with you. Ok first story. I'm in a training class that's going to last about a month and it's kind of a bizarre class as I'm in the actual classroom for two days and I'm in a "virtual" classroom the other three. Really weird. Like wicked weird. Anyways, today I was in a virtual lecture and the instructor was asking whether we could all hear him. So someone happened to type at the exact same time, "has the class started?" So our brilliant instructor then relays over the microphone, if you cannot hear me, please respond now telling me that you are unable to hear me. I just sat staring at the screen. Ae you effing kidding Me? Please respond if you can't hear me? That's like in elementary school when the teacher jokingly asks you to raise your hand if your not there and some moron always thought it says funny to raise their hand. I personally felt that that meant that their bodies were there but their minds weren't so it was kind of like answering the question. You know, it was kind of their only outlet for them to say, why yes, I am an idiot. Tank you so much for letting me verify that fact with the class. Anyways, that's how I felt when I heard that comment. Fortunately someone else responded before I could. "just FYI, if he can't hear you, he can't respond. Just a suggestion but you might want to TYPE that comment. Kind of makes more sense." I don't know who the guy was, but he is my new best friend. A crusader trying his best to save the world from stupidity. A truly great challenge and one that I wish him the best in. I Caen only hope for more Technological greatness in the future. :) have a happy March everyone!

Frosty

It's a frosty day here in the nations capital, but I must say that I thought that it felt very nice...as long as the wind wasn't blowing. So basically it was freezing because let's be honest, IT WAS WINDY! But this weather is absolutely perfect for watching football, especially the PLAYOFFS! I've gotta say, I have not been disappointed by the playoff games this year. I don't know how many of you watched the playoff games that were happening yesterday, but they were truly amazing. ESPN and just about every football morning show were hyping the Patrios-Broncos game, but honestly, the game that they should have been hyping was the 49ers-Saints game. Both teams were tremendously coached and had solid teams on both sides of the ball which made watching the game a true joy. It was like watching the clash of the Titans. So.freaking.awesome. If you havent been watching the playoff games, turn on the TV and watch the Packers-Giants game thats about to start because you're gonna be in for a real treat. The Giants are finally healthy and let's be real, the Packers have something special going on. So what's the point of this post: a thank you to the NFL for actually playing their butts off in the playoffs.

Oh, and for everyone that is hating on Tebow because of the final score yesterday, please don't comment unless you watched the game. That team broke down on both sides of the ball. Tom Brady tore the Broncos defense to shreds and I dont think anyone expected the Patriots defense to finally show up to play. Ravens, you better hope that the Patriots defense doesn't come to play next week because if you play the Patriots the way you played today, Joe Flacco will be in the hospital because the Ravens offensive line was pathetic today and they were lucky that TJ Yates threw those 3 interceptions. If the Ravens play the way they played today, expect another high-scoring game for the Patriots.

And just for kicks, I started playing with the Instagram app on my iPad. Freaking awesome. Here are some of the photos I played with on that app

Have a great Sunday!







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- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Change

Wow, its been a really long time since my last post.  Heck the whole blogspot layout has changed!  Not that thats a bad thing.  Its merely life.  So a lot has changed since my last post.  I changed jobs and I absolutely love my new job.  Its a bit bizarre.  No one at work quite understands what it is that I do and to be quite honest, neither does the majority of my company, but whats most interesting is the fact that I get to part of an amazing team that gets to define what our speciality is exactly.  So basically, I'm making it all up as I go.  Just another day in the life of me.  Some days are better than others, but what I can honestly say is that I'm having a blast.  I think whats most interesting is the different ways in which people who are supposedly doing the same thing, view a problem and therefore go about tackling that problem in different ways.  At first, it kind of annoyed me because I couldn't understand why no one could see what was plainly in front of them, but then I began to realize that my background really did provide me with a completely different view on the problem from the rest of my group.  At school, it always seemed like I had to try hard to come up with a different perspective.  What I'm realizing now is that, I wasn't really trying that hard.  It's just the way I view things.  Interesting, no?

So I've been exploring DC a bit more and last weekend I went to the Maine Avenue Fish Market aka the Wharf.  It was interesting watching all the different types of people that went to the market.  There were people who were obviously tourists...you know, like they had their cameras out and wanted to take photos with the live crabs and stuff.  Ok, hey now, I did not want my photo with a live crab.  But I may have viewed the fish market initially through the lens of my camera. :) Then it was interesting watching the 20 and 30 somethings ride their bikes down to buy fresh fish for a meal.  Then you could see the people that were obviously locals, but there seemed to be less of those than I had expected.  Does that mean that the market is more of a gimmick rather than a place that has a sense of authenticity.  Or did I just go on an off day.  My parents were telling me that when they first moved to DC over 30 years ago, the market was larger and busier.  The wharf and the area surrounding it was considered to be a nice area.  Now, theres a tennis court and a parking lot as well as a storage area and lets just say that I wouldn't want to get caught there late at night.  Again, this is not a criticism, but rather a reflection of how fast-paced our world is.  This phrase seems to constantly be thrown at us.  We've almost become immune to it, but we shouldn't.  I'm not saying to stop change.  Heck, I love change.  I'd be out of a job if things didn't change on the regular.  Or rather, my job would be wicked easy and boring...totally lame.  Rather, I'm saying to be mindful of the things that came before.  Don't dwell or live in your memories, but rather be mindful that you are the carrier of these memories and that they survive only through you.

So here are some of my photos from The Wharf:

These photos were taken from my iPhone.

Shoutout to Ms CHRISTINE NGUYEN!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!